Mind you, I enjoy flying for the most part. Talkative seatmates apart, it’s a great time to get caught up on my reading, taking a little nap, and reading some more. There are aggravations, but for the most part minor. I like to complain when I travel, but it’s just sport, like complaining about cafeteria food.
I do not, however, enjoy being treated like a small child. Neither does Willy Stern, who vents about inane FAA regulations in The Weekly Standard :
“FAA regulation 121.311 says your seat has to be in its full and upright position during takeoffs and landings. It’s the reason the pesky flight attendant leans over to press that little button, waking you up 20 minutes before landing. (The regulation contains 1,382 words—more than twice as many as the Bill of Rights.) The FAA says this is in case of the need for a quick exit if the plane crashes. The theory is that an extra inch or two just might make the difference in squeezing out of your seat. The rule is also enforced in first class where—even with the seats reclined—there is often far more space to get out than in the best of conditions in the cheap seats in the main cabin . . . .
“And, of course, it’s worth getting woken up from our naps to buckle our belts and adjust our seats since airplanes crash so often, right? National Transportation Safety Board data for the last full five years indicate some 95 million commercial aircraft hours flown .??.??. and nine major accidents! We should credit the FAA with an exceptional safety record. You’ve got a better chance of being struck by lightning than of crashing in a jet. In fact, you’ve got a better chance of being struck twice by lightning than of going down with one of the big commercial operators.
“But rest assured, Big Brother FAA is always looking out for you. Take the seat belt law, first written in 1941 and updated 30 years later. According to an agency spokesman, ‘The FAA believes the logic behind restraining a passenger in the event of impact is self-evident.’ Really? It’s not to public transport officials in dozens of cities around the country whose vehicles lack seat belts.”
In case you’re feeling an urge of civil disobedience welling up, you should count the cost: “The fine for failing to comply with the FAA’s seat belt dictum: $1,100.”
Dear Reader,
Can I be direct with you?
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