Nones on Sunday

One day I woke up and became a None;
It gave me lots more time to think and pray.
I’d think about bad things religion’s done,
And pray that God would now see things my way.
I wasn’t like those numskulls who believed
Almighty God did not per se exist.
I mainly just preferred to be relieved
From Sunday wake-ups on which he’d insist.
Instead I’d get up just in time for brunch,
And nod at all the other Nones I’d see.
And God (per se) I duly thanked a bunch
For giving us mimosa that was free.
Some fellow Nones observed me giving thanks
And threatened to remove me from the ranks.

—Joseph Mirra

Photo by Adam Dachis via Creative Commons. Image cropped.