Geezer Rock-Listening Baby Boomers Take Over Vatican Newspaper

Did Jeffrey “The Dude” Lebowski get a job at L’ Osservatore Romano ? That seems to be the only explanation for the Holy See’s official newspaper including these works on their list of top ten rock and pop albums of all time:

The Beatles’ “Revolver”
Pink Floyd’s “The Dark Side of The Moon”
Oasis’  “(What’s the Story) Morning Glory?”
Michael Jackson’s “Thriller”
U2’s “Achtung Baby”
Fleetwood Mac’s “Rumours”
Donald Fagen’s “The Nightfly”
Carlos Santana’s “Supernatural”
Paul Simon’s “Graceland”
David Crosby’s “If I Could Only Remember My Name.”

According to the WSJ , the rock critics at L’ Osservatore claim the albums are perfect listening material for anyone who finds himself marooned on a desert island. This could not be more wrong. Unless you’re stranded on a island with a bunch of hippies, there is no way you want to listen to Pink Floyd, Donald Fagen, and David Crosby. (As a matter of fact, if you’re stranded on an island with hippies those are also the last albums you’d ever want to listen to.)

“Thriller” deserves a place on the list but I can’t imagine how the others made the cut. U2 and the Beatles should be included but “Achtung Baby” and “Revolver” aren’t even their best albums (those would be “Joshua Tree” and “The White Album”). And who in their right mind thinks that any albums containing the talentless Wyclef Jean warbling “Maria Maria” or the Gallagher brothers singing “Champagne Supernova” belong on an all-time best list? Are they trying to convince us that rock really is the devil’s music?

The paper did, however, get one thing right:

The article by Giuseppe Fiorentino and Gaetano Vallini said that Bob Dylan was excluded from the list despite his “great poetic vein” because he paved the way for generations of unprofessional singer-songwriters who have “harshly tested the ears and patience of listeners” with their tormented stories.

What would a better list look like? Provide your revisions in the comment section.