So, here’s what they suggest doing. 
In the contrarian spirit of Saint Jerome, whose feast it was first, here are some alternative ideas:
Put a WWJDrive bumper sticker on your 15-passenger van.
Tell a girl that growing up to be a wife and mommy is an interesting and intellectually satisfying thing to do.
Buy a boy an AirSoft gun, some genuine lead soldiers, and a miniature Mass set.
Remind yourself that the entire world isn’t twenty-two years old, and that looking and acting your age is not a sign of dementia.
Admit that you don’t know who Jon and Kate are, much less care what they do.
Shop at Wal-Mart.
Drink some instant coffee, some Hawaiian Punch, and/or some jug wine.
Do something for the sole reason that your husband would like it.
Wear a pro-life t-shirt.
Admit that you hated reading Lolita.
Put a disposable diaper on that baby.
Wave a Confederate battle flag (it’s one way to get people to talk to you).
Stay married.
Sing “Onward, Christian Soldiers.”
Don’t work out.
This would also be a good day to recite the Divine Praises as a subversive gesture.
(With many thanks to my group of friends who’ve been sending around their own “alternative blasphemy” suggestions. This is my contribution to that conversation.)
You have a decision to make: double or nothing.
For this week only, a generous supporter has offered to fully match all new and increased donations to First Things up to $60,000.
In other words, your gift of $50 unlocks $100 for First Things, your gift of $100 unlocks $200, and so on, up to a total of $120,000. But if you don’t give, nothing.
So what will it be, dear reader: double, or nothing?
Make your year-end gift go twice as far for First Things by giving now.
