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    Monday, October 19, 2009, 7:33 PM

    If indeed an evangelical is a fundamentalist who dresses up for Halloween, a definition I accept with eagerness, we can expand on the list already given to further clarify what we have in common and what still divides us:

    Apologetics:

    - an evangelical in the Van Til (presuppositionalist) tradition: kids dress up as obscure Reformation characters, but refuse to explain to “outsiders” who they are since the outsider would need a Biblical world view to understand.

    -an evangelical in the Mars Hill tradition: kids dress up as witches in order to explain appropriating cultural icons to the gospel.

    -an evangelical in the Moreland tradition: kids dress up as Aquinas, but explain that even Catholics don’t think he was right about everything.

    Darwinism:

    - an evangelical and young earth creationist: kids dress up as old people and argue for “appearance of age.”

    -an evangelical and old earth creationist: kids dress up as a  fossil animal suffering horrific death before sin, but feel better about the age of the earth problem.

    -an evangelical and intelligent design theorist: kids dress up as scientists and get sued by ACLU because they are not.

    -an evangelical and theistic evolutionist: kids dress up as Darwin and get mad if you ask who they are.

    College Christianity:

    Campus Crusade evangelical: has four kids who dress up as Biblical characters and give students candy. Loses major donor support when Facebook pictures reveal Halloween celebration.

    InterVarsity evangelical: knows that when she has a child they will be thoughtful in their choice of characters, if he or she chooses to be one. Gains donor support for thoughtful Twitter account of actions of future children.

    2 Comments

      Shawn
      October 19th, 2009 | 10:49 pm | #1

      Brilliant, sir. There needs to be a way to share this on Facebook.

      Andy
      October 20th, 2009 | 9:01 am | #2

      Are the kids still going on about “appearance of age?” I thought “time dilation” was the hot thing these days?